Motherly Anexity

Up until today I had yet to experience extreme over concern for Braylon. He is always with me or Colin. Well today that changed. Colin's dad had a birthday party today where there was about 27 people. Most were family and really 27 is not that much. I however have had anxiety moments from the moment it started. Braylon was being passed around, which I am normally okay with, and he was having a good time. I was concerned that he needed me and was constantly keeling my eyes on him. I have never had this feeling where I did not want anyone else holding him and that I just wanted my baby. I want to hold him. It was so strange. I fought back my urge to run and take my baby away from them and instead resorted to watching him like a hawk. I did not let him out of my eyesight! I have a feeling that this anxiety is only going to get worse. Tomorrow is the Rice family easter picnic. There will be between fifty and seventy five people there. I know that Braylon will once again become a pass around baby. And I will once again have to fight my urge to snatch him away all for myself.

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